AZG 06

Chapter 06

I said cautiously, “I’ll do my best.”

Eldest Brother said solemnly, “You must do your utmost, otherwise we won’t be able to hold ourselves back from yelling at him. Then his mother will make a scene, the Master will lose his temper, and the New Year will be completely ruined.”

I really couldn’t shoulder such a heavy responsibility…

Zhao Gongzi is so loathsome.

Zhao Gongzi and I sat in my room playing a crossword puzzle. Before we could even finish it, he grew bored and said he wanted to read a book instead. Reading is a very good thing, and it would be even better if the books he read were respectable.

As he read, he kept glancing at me. Eventually, he asked if I wanted to play a game.

I asked warily, “What kind of game?”

He said we would play cards, and whoever lost had to take off an article of clothing.

I refused to play.

Since I wouldn’t play, he threatened to go outside and find someone else to play with. But Eldest Brother had explicitly instructed me that he wasn’t allowed out before midnight.

I said, “I’m not taking off my clothes.”

He said it was fine if I didn’t strip; instead, whoever lost would have to kiss the other person.

I cautiously concluded that regardless of whether I won or lost this game, I would not be very happy.

So, I opened the bedroom door and said, “Go on out then.”

Yet, he refused to leave. He just looked at his book, and then looked at me.

I felt a slight sense of trepidation and unease.

In the end, Zhao Gongzi still got beaten.

By me.

Clutching his nose, he cursed at me, “Damn it! Weren’t you supposed to be unable to fight?!”

I can’t fight, but I can fight for my life.

He threatened me, “I’m going to tell my dad!”

I pointed at the door. “If you’ve got the guts, go tell him. If you don’t, you’ll take my last name.”

Zhao Gongzi stared at me in astonishment. “Are you insane?”

I intimidated him, “Do you know how my father died?”

Zhao Gongzi hesitated for a moment, then said, “Wasn’t he hacked to death by Uncle Ali?”

I said, “No. He was beaten to death by me. Because he tried to kiss me, I waited until he was asleep and beat him to death.”

Zhao Gongzi looked at me, utterly shocked. “You’re lying, right?”

I said, “Believe it or not, it’s up to you.”

Zhao Gongzi walked toward the door. “I’m not playing with you anymore. You’re sick.”

I offered my solemn apologies to Eldest Brother for failing to keep an eye on Zhao Gongzi.

Eldest Brother said it was fine since it was almost midnight. Once midnight passed, they could thrash Zhao Gongzi anyway.

When midnight arrived, everyone in the main hall stood staring at the clock. Uncle Ali was out in the courtyard, lighting up a cigarette while waiting to set off the firecrackers.

The moment the firecrackers crackled to life, everyone began showering Fourth Master Zhao with New Year blessings.

Standing in the corner, I joined the crowd in offering my New Year greetings to Fourth Master Zhao, when suddenly my head was wrenched around and a kiss was planted right on my lips. The moment the kiss ended, the culprit leapt three paces away and bellowed, “Damn it! Hit me if you can!”

At precisely three minutes past midnight, Zhao Gongzi brought a thorough thrashing upon himself.

May great luck and prosperity prevail, and may nothing be taboo.

I finally finished my bath and was changing my clothes in the bedroom. Zhao Gongzi sat on the bed, listlessly flipping through a newspaper. “What took you so long in there?”

I said, “I was reflecting on just how loathsome you are.”

He looked like he wanted to curse at me again, but stopped himself. “Forget it, today is New Year’s Day. I won’t scold you. Let’s go downstairs to eat.”

Once I was dressed, I walked over to the edge of the bed and gave him a polite kiss.

In the end, he still scolded me, using terms that were utterly foul and unmentionable.

When Uncle Ali knocked on the door from outside to urge us down for dinner, Zhao Gongzi was still persevering in his tirade against me. Uncle Ali remained silent for a moment—and whether he actually heard it or not—he simply stopped calling for us.

I didn’t get to eat any dinner, and I didn’t even have the face to step out of the door again.

Loathsome Zhao Gongzi.

Chapter 5: A User Report

Recently, I struck luck in a lottery and was gifted a briefcase by the department store. It’s a new style, made of genuine leather, and I hear it is highly popular among foreigners.

Yet, Zhao Gongzi started throwing an unreasonable tantrum over it. “Have I given you too few things? How come I never see you carrying them around with you every single day?”

Attempting to reason with him, I flashed my wristwatch. “I am wearing this.”

But Zhao Gongzi refused to let it go. “What about the hat?”

Even though I find Zhao Gongzi incredibly loathsome, it’s safe to say that no regular person would actively want to wear a green hat. [Translator’s Note: In Chinese culture, “wearing a green hat” is an idiom for being cuckolded.]

…Well, fine, except for the unconventional Zhao Gongzi.

I had tactfully mentioned the connotation of the green hat to him before, only for him to turn things around and criticize me for being closed-minded. “Look at you with your Western academy, Western trading firms, Western books, and Western suits. How come you’re just like my dad and his generation when it comes to this sort of thing?”

Yet, despite speaking with such righteous indignation, he was actually just defending his right to wear a green hat. He knew perfectly well that I had detested his wardrobe for a very long time. Why on earth does he love the color green so much?

I like red.

Red is festive.

He and I truly possess an innate incompatibility.

Zhao Gongzi asked again, “Well, I’ve given you other things too, and I don’t see you carrying them around every day.”

I asked, “For instance?”

Zhao Gongzi: “The bicycle I gave you.”

I said, “As long as I’m not running late for work, I always ride that bicycle.”

Zhao Gongzi: “Oh. You wake up so early, I didn’t know.”

I said, “Yes, indeed. And when I come home, it’s still very early, while Zhao Gongzi is still at the dance hall.”

Zhao Gongzi: “Speak properly. I’m there to talk business.”

Only disreputable business requires going to a dance hall to discuss. Jin Xian’er told me so. He said that the business Zhao Gongzi discusses is entirely disreputable, and since Zhao Gongzi always brings him along, Zhao Gongzi isn’t reputable either.

…Actually, I am starting to suspect what Jin Xian’er is truly up to.

But I would never say it out loud.

Nor would I ever tell Jin Xian’er that I saw through it all from a young age: Zhao Gongzi will probably never be a respectable man in this lifetime. Yet, what of it? In these troubled times, people are like floating duckweed. The Zhao family has supported me for so many years; I cannot be ungrateful, so I can only muddle along.

Zhao Gongzi asked yet again, “Have you read the books I gave you?”

I said, “I have.”

Twelve identical copies of the exact same book—and I had already read it before he ever gifted me the very first one.