Chapter 18
I said, “Shut up.”
After a moment, I said, “It is the will of heaven.”
Zhao Gongzi said, “Oh. I guess so.”
I said, “I want to see Ham, and take a couple of pieces of clothing while I’m at it. I resigned from the trading firm, so I have to look for a new job.”
Zhao Gongzi said, “Oh.”
I asked, “It won’t cause a misunderstanding with your friends, will it?”
Zhao Gongzi said, “I don’t have friends.”
I said, “That lady who was walking Ham…”
Zhao Gongzi said, “My mother’s mahjong partner’s daughter. No idea why she likes walking dogs so much. She’s sick in the head.”
I said, “That gentleman who was playing Frisbee with Ham…”
Zhao Gongzi said, “Eldest Brother’s classmate’s nephew. No idea why he likes throwing Frisbees with dogs. Sick in the head.”
Zhao Gongzi added, “Probably trying to swindle me out of my money.”
The people selling you clothes and Jin Xian’er are the ones who actually want to swindle you out of your money. The difference between those people and the ones who actually want to swindle you is incredibly subtle; I hope you realize that.
Zhao Gongzi said, “I know. They just want to swindle me.”
I said, “Yes.”
Zhao Gongzi cast a glance at me.
I pretended not to notice.
Zhao Gongzi said, “You’re the one swindling me.”
I said, “What happens between you and me cannot be called swindling. It’s a lack of communication.”
Zhao Gongzi: “Humph.”
Either way, it was still profoundly awkward.
Zhao Gongzi continued to smoke, and I continued to stare at the ceiling.
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Zhao Gongzi and I checked out of the room, bought some groceries at the market, and walked all the way back to the apartment. As we were walking along the road, someone suddenly called out to stop me: “Yixin! I’ve been looking for you for a very long time!”
I looked at the man. “Principal Sun…”
I felt I had let Principal Sun down. He had helped me so enthusiastically to go study abroad, yet I had missed the time. The will of heaven.
Principal Sun caught his breath and said, “I originally thought I wouldn’t make it in time and was about to give up. But then I heard someone say the cruise ship’s departure was delayed for some reason and won’t leave until tomorrow morning, so I rushed right over to find you. Do me a favor and take a book over to my friend, Professor Smith. This book is very hard to find, and I’m afraid it might get lost if sent by mail.”
Zhao Gongzi cursed at him, “Damn it! Would you fucking drop dead if it got lost and you had to buy another copy?!”
Principal Sun looked at Zhao Gongzi in astonishment. “How can you speak like that? You… you are… you look like a student too.”
Zhao Gongzi barked at him, “I stopped being a student of yours eight hundred years ago! None of your fucking business!”
I said, “Shut up. My apologies, Principal. Please don’t lower yourself to his level. Give the book to me.”
Seeing how fierce and menacing Zhao Gongzi was, Principal Sun handed the book to me and left immediately.
Zhao Gongzi and I stood on the street, once again plunged into an awkward predicament.
I said, “It is the will of heaven.”
The will of heaven supported my pursuit of freedom.
I asked, “Can I still see Ham one last time?”
Zhao Gongzi said coldly, “Oh.”
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I truly only saw Ham for a single glance. Before Ham even had the chance to get close to me, he was locked in the kitchen by Zhao Gongzi.
And then, from the living room to the bedroom, Zhao Gongzi and I did this and that, so on and so forth.
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In the dead of night, I woke up and went to the living room to drink water. While I was at it, I fed Ham, and took a look at those books of mine. The identical books Zhao Gongzi had gifted me were placed on the shelf in the living room as ornaments.
I didn’t open them to read.
I stood there for a brief moment, then went back to the bedroom. I saw Zhao Gongzi sitting at the head of the bed, eating a piece of chocolate.
I knelt on the bed, leaned over, and snatched half a piece away.
It wasn’t that I didn’t understand the virtue of humility, but rather that I was the only person capable of snatching chocolate right out of Zhao Gongzi’s mouth.
After finishing the chocolate, I felt Zhao Gongzi’s abs, and a bold idea suddenly struck me.
I asked Zhao Gongzi, “Has anyone ever invited you to elope?”
Zhao Gongzi asked me, “What about my dog?”
I figured Jin Xian’er probably needed some sort of memento from this relationship, like an enthusiastic dog, for instance.
Zhao Gongzi said displeasedly, “He is my dog.”
I said, “Dogs are not allowed on the cruise ship.”
Zhao Gongzi said, “My dog.”
He really is loathsome.
I said, “Then you stay behind to raise the dog.”
Zhao Gongzi said, “Jin Xian’er has been very sensible recently. He ought to get something.”
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When Jin Xian’er opened the door at six in the morning wearing his bathrobe and was presented with a lovely dog, he smiled and uttered a single word: “Fuck.”
I said, “Thank you and I love you.”
Zhao Gongzi said coldly, “I can understand those two sentences.”
Jin Xian’er said, “You don’t know how I love you.”
Zhao Gongzi asked coldly, “What did you say?”
Jin Xian’er slammed the door shut.
Zhao Gongzi asked me, “What did he say?”
I said, “He said he will take good care of Ham. The one he loves is you, but he is willing to bless you and me.”
Zhao Gongzi: “Sick in the head.”
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However, inkling of our plan was still spotted after all. Just as Zhao Gongzi and I were boarding the ship, a commotion broke out in the crowd. Uncle Dali came charging over at the head of a group of men: “Xiao Long, don’t be impulsive! Don’t believe Qiu Yixin’s words! This isn’t the first time he’s sold you out! Your dad is about to arrive! Wake up!”
I grabbed Zhao Gongzi’s hand and squeezed right into the crowd. The ship was about to set sail. Once it set sail, and once the two of us reached abroad, Fourth Master Zhao wouldn’t be able to do a damn thing to me.
Uncle Dali bellowed at the top of his lungs, his voice splitting with desperation: “Qiu Yixin, you ungrateful son of a bitch! Xiao Long, don’t let him deceive you! Qiu Yixin, you shameless bastard! Xiao Long, if you leave, you’ll be in a strange land, and once Qiu Yixin runs out of money, he will sell you out!”
As I ran while pulling Zhao Gongzi along, I said to him, “I won’t. I won’t sell you out. I tucked the check you gave me yesterday safely inside my clothes. Your mother is about to give birth, so you won’t be the youngest child anymore, and they won’t dote on you the most anymore. Only I will dote on you the most. Besides, I can’t give birth to children anyway, so I will dote on you the most for the rest of my life.”
